Tuesday, August 31, 2010

in the secret place

The journey of trust has been a difficult yet most wonderful experience in my walk with Him.
Recently had a major changes of things in my life, how I met crossroads, seeking the Lord for a fresh new direction ahead, etc..etc..u name it! :p
Looking back, I thank God for His presence with me...a lot times, the answers are not necessarily important, but knowing that He's with me, that's sometimes enough.
So even though I'm still left with many uncertainties with the decisions that I made, but never in my life that I felt so certain of what I'm doing.

It is through this journey where I was to give up everything to Him, I mean everything...but it's a choice that I make each time. The pain of dying to self, over and over again...that's taking up the cross to really follow His footsteps. I know what the cost is, and I guess, I have decided that whatever it takes, I would say 'Yes, Lord' to whatever He ask me to, because I know that through those things, He revealed Himself more, and I'm seeing Him more in my life.

It is through this difficult journey that I've discovered a secret place, a place where I can rest, fully assured and to dwell, filled with so much of His peace and joy.And in that secret place, there's so much more...

In that secret place,i'm never so desperate and hungry for more of Him in my life before, that the quest for His presence in my life, to know Him, to hear what He's saying, what His heart beats for..it means the world to me :) and the Lord is faithful, so good...that He never disappoint me.

My very heart desire is to come closer to Him, but yet I found that it's the most scariest experience that I have ever known. To hear His heart beat when He reveals Himself, the Holiness of who He is, this tiny and fragile heart that I have, sometimes it feels like it's going to explode to pieces, the intensity of His love..no one would be able to comprehend.
Sometimes I wonder if I could live through if I come to feel what He feels..
I realize that it's all by the grace, to approach His throne and come before Him.

In that secret place, there's the Father's heart, where I felt and heard a cry...a cry for the lost, the broken, the poor. It overwhelms me many times, for I find myself helpless and useless at times, asking myself, what can I do? what do You want me to do? then I fell on my knees, and begin to express the cries of the Father's heart for the people He brought into my heart. I am crying out for the Father's will to be done on earth as it is in Heaven, as how He purpose it to be.

Can you hear the cries of His heart? Enter the secret place...it's the place where He wants you to be..